Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
We Don't Live in a Perfect World
In a perfect world, life doesn't hurt. There is no pain. We don't have to shed tears because all is perfect and well. Reality tells us, though, that we don't live in a perfect world. Instead, we do have pain, sorrow, and tragedies that come into our lives quite unexpectedly. Life isn't always fair, and we are left asking that age-old question, "Why?".
I don't think we'll ever answer the "why" question good enough to satisfy us, BUT we can understand that we are not alone in our pain. In this world, there are many sufferers, and we each can learn from one another and gain new strength and hope as we travel this road of grief.
As has been said before, sorrow is a new language that we must learn, and it gives us new eyes in which we view all of life. At first we feel like foreigners struggling to find our way without a map. After a while, though, we begin to struggle less until finally we find a new place to call home, we learn the new language, and we have keener, sharper eyesight in which to view life's beauty.
If you are struggling today in the land of sorrow, hold on and continue putting one foot forward until you find your place of level ground. Trust that as you travel this often lonely path, you will find others along the way who will reach out and help you. They will speak your language, and you will no longer feel alone.
You will be filled with new hope each day until finally your small flicker will turn into a sunbeam of hope that will light the way for you from the dark path of sorrow into the healing light of new-found peace and inner joy!
A thought: "Yes, things are different now, but they will get better! Hope is alive, and will lead the way!" -- Clara Hinton
"Behold, God is my helper; the Lord is the sustainer of my soul." --Psalm 54:4
NOTE: It is my sincere hope that you've found a bit of sunshine in these words. Visit often as I continue to all hopeful messages, thoughts, and Scriptures.
Love,
Clara Hinton
I don't think we'll ever answer the "why" question good enough to satisfy us, BUT we can understand that we are not alone in our pain. In this world, there are many sufferers, and we each can learn from one another and gain new strength and hope as we travel this road of grief.
As has been said before, sorrow is a new language that we must learn, and it gives us new eyes in which we view all of life. At first we feel like foreigners struggling to find our way without a map. After a while, though, we begin to struggle less until finally we find a new place to call home, we learn the new language, and we have keener, sharper eyesight in which to view life's beauty.
If you are struggling today in the land of sorrow, hold on and continue putting one foot forward until you find your place of level ground. Trust that as you travel this often lonely path, you will find others along the way who will reach out and help you. They will speak your language, and you will no longer feel alone.
You will be filled with new hope each day until finally your small flicker will turn into a sunbeam of hope that will light the way for you from the dark path of sorrow into the healing light of new-found peace and inner joy!
A thought: "Yes, things are different now, but they will get better! Hope is alive, and will lead the way!" -- Clara Hinton
"Behold, God is my helper; the Lord is the sustainer of my soul." --Psalm 54:4
NOTE: It is my sincere hope that you've found a bit of sunshine in these words. Visit often as I continue to all hopeful messages, thoughts, and Scriptures.
Love,
Clara Hinton
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Getting through Mother's Day during Child Loss
Mother’s Day will soon be here, and while that day is an awesome day of celebration for some, it is also one of the most painful days of the year to get through for the many mothers who are living with the heartache of child loss.
I have been a mother in grief. Twenty-two years ago on Mother’s Day I was carrying my son who was to be born in July. Instead, I found out that he had died inside of me, and I spent Mother’s Day carrying my little boy knowing that his heart had stopped beating forever. He was delivered “still” on the Thursday following Mother’s Day.
Having “been there”, I can tell you that there is no right or wrong way to approach Mother’s Day when grieving. Do what is best for you, and don’t spend countless hours trying to please others around you. If you want to take a walk among nature to reflect, then do it. If you want to skip family meals and all reminders of Mother’s Day, then do it. And, remember that you don’t owe the world an explanation. This is one time when it’s necessary to be selfish in your actions. You know what is best for you, and this is a time to take care of yourself.
Remembering your child is a very personal thing, and you might find that others will not remember, or if they do remember your child, they might not mention your child by name. Others don’t like to see us cry, so they avoid the obvious. “My child isn’t here, and I’m in pain.” Cry. Journal. Scream. Sleep. Light a candle. Release a balloon. Write a poem in memory of your child. All of these are ways to “get through Mother’s Day” when you are missing your child. Again, this is very personal. Do what is best for YOU to get through.
Lastly, remember that this day will pass. You will make it, and when you do you will have accomplished a big step in your journey we call healing. – Clara Hinton
“My child, I love you, and I always will.” --Clara Hinton
“In the day of my trouble I shall call upon Thee, for Thou wilt answer me.” --Psalm 86:7
I have been a mother in grief. Twenty-two years ago on Mother’s Day I was carrying my son who was to be born in July. Instead, I found out that he had died inside of me, and I spent Mother’s Day carrying my little boy knowing that his heart had stopped beating forever. He was delivered “still” on the Thursday following Mother’s Day.
Having “been there”, I can tell you that there is no right or wrong way to approach Mother’s Day when grieving. Do what is best for you, and don’t spend countless hours trying to please others around you. If you want to take a walk among nature to reflect, then do it. If you want to skip family meals and all reminders of Mother’s Day, then do it. And, remember that you don’t owe the world an explanation. This is one time when it’s necessary to be selfish in your actions. You know what is best for you, and this is a time to take care of yourself.
Remembering your child is a very personal thing, and you might find that others will not remember, or if they do remember your child, they might not mention your child by name. Others don’t like to see us cry, so they avoid the obvious. “My child isn’t here, and I’m in pain.” Cry. Journal. Scream. Sleep. Light a candle. Release a balloon. Write a poem in memory of your child. All of these are ways to “get through Mother’s Day” when you are missing your child. Again, this is very personal. Do what is best for YOU to get through.
Lastly, remember that this day will pass. You will make it, and when you do you will have accomplished a big step in your journey we call healing. – Clara Hinton
“My child, I love you, and I always will.” --Clara Hinton
“In the day of my trouble I shall call upon Thee, for Thou wilt answer me.” --Psalm 86:7
Monday, May 3, 2010
Hope is an Amazing, Powerful Strength!
In our grief, sometimes we feel so isolated and alone that we feel we’ve been singled out. While our grief is unique and is totally ours, we do belong to a family of people traveling that same difficult journey called grief. Many times, we need to remind ourselves of this or we can sink into a hole of despair that is so dark and lonely that we cannot find the light of day.
Grief is unique, but it is also universal. I cannot feel the same intensity of pain as you, but I can offer you encouragement through my pain. We have not been left alone even though there are times in our walking with grief that it feels that way.
How can I cope? How can I get through this day, or even this hour when I feel this alone? It often helps to walk among nature and to see the communion we have with all of life. Soak up the beauty of the flowers and trees and birds, the sky, and all of nature. Our heavenly Father has not left us alone in our darkest hours. He is near, and He will give us rest from the weariness of pain and grief if only we will lean on Him. If He cares for every detail of nature, does He not care more deeply for us?
Hope is an amazing, powerful strength that lies within us. For a while, it lays dormant after a loss, but then slowly our hope is ignited and it grows in proportion to our belief an understanding that we have not been left alone. Hope heals. Hope comforts. Hope helps us look to the future with eyes no longer clothed in tears but with peace! --C. Hinton
“In this life, I am never alone. Hope bathes my heart in peace, and comforts me every hour of every day!” --Clara Hinton
“The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.” --Psalm 23:1-3a
Grief is unique, but it is also universal. I cannot feel the same intensity of pain as you, but I can offer you encouragement through my pain. We have not been left alone even though there are times in our walking with grief that it feels that way.
How can I cope? How can I get through this day, or even this hour when I feel this alone? It often helps to walk among nature and to see the communion we have with all of life. Soak up the beauty of the flowers and trees and birds, the sky, and all of nature. Our heavenly Father has not left us alone in our darkest hours. He is near, and He will give us rest from the weariness of pain and grief if only we will lean on Him. If He cares for every detail of nature, does He not care more deeply for us?
Hope is an amazing, powerful strength that lies within us. For a while, it lays dormant after a loss, but then slowly our hope is ignited and it grows in proportion to our belief an understanding that we have not been left alone. Hope heals. Hope comforts. Hope helps us look to the future with eyes no longer clothed in tears but with peace! --C. Hinton
“In this life, I am never alone. Hope bathes my heart in peace, and comforts me every hour of every day!” --Clara Hinton
“The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.” --Psalm 23:1-3a
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Tidal Waves of Grief
Grief seems to hit us like a tidal wave at times when we least expect it. We can be plodding along in life "okay" when all of a sudden we get smacked hard with the reality of our loss, and we're left feeling like we're drowning in a sea of sorrow with no life jacket in sight.
Being aware of how grief works is a critical part of our grief journey. Knowing that we can get these "grief attacks" unexpectedly can actually help us to prepare for them. When your tidal wave of grief hits, take some long, deep breaths, and prepare to wait it out. Don't fight it or try to swim against the tide. You will only exhaust yourself both physically and emotionally. Feel the pain with the knowledge that following this storm, the seas will once again return to calm, and
you will have better days ahead.
The pain will begin to subside as you begin to acknowledge the fact that grief attacks are only momentary in nature. The raw part of grief work has already been done, adn you will be able to manage your grief by thinking more calm thoughts, journaling your emotions, taking a walk among nature, and calling on a friend or two for some encouragement.
Did you get hit by a tidal wave today? Take courage in knowing that you're going to make it. Others have walked this path before you and they've made it and you will, too! Your hope is bigger than your fear. Your courage is stronger than your pain. And, your hope is always alive and at work!
A thought: "I will face my pain with courage. I will make it!" -Clara Hinton
"For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord gives grace and glory." --Psalm 84:11
NOTE: It is always my prayer that you've received some much-needed hope and encouragement by visiting this place of hope!
Love,
Clara Hinton
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Prayer is an Amazing Avenue of Healing!
Are you feeling overwhelmed by loss today? Does it feel as though life has abandoned you and you’re all alone in your grief? Have you come to the point of almost wanting to give up?
Hold on! There is hope beyond the grief, and that hope never fails to arrive at just the right moment in your life!
Take a walk alone today and look at the sky, slowly breathe in the air, and feel the breeze brush gently across your face. Hear the whispers of God in all of nature and allow His presence to touch your heart. Feel His nearness and be assured that you have not been left alone in your pain.
Prayer is an amazing avenue of healing because it allows you to talk to the Physician, and the One who truly understands. You can say what’s on your heart and mind without fear of being misrepresented or misunderstood. There is no fear being placed on you when you speak to God in prayer. He listens. He understands. He sends comfort. He is your tender Father who cares.
What is on your heavy heart today? Sadness? Emptiness? Loneliness? Feeling forgotten and misused? Feeling abandoned? Then walk among the fields. Touch the lilies. Catch a butterfly. Allow the raindrops to fall gently across your face, and know that you are never alone! Hope is alive and will continue to grow stronger with each passing day when you open your heart to prayer. – Clara Hinton
“Praying is talking in confidence to the One who cares.” --C. Hinton
“Pray without ceasing.” -- I Thessalonians 5:17
Hold on! There is hope beyond the grief, and that hope never fails to arrive at just the right moment in your life!
Take a walk alone today and look at the sky, slowly breathe in the air, and feel the breeze brush gently across your face. Hear the whispers of God in all of nature and allow His presence to touch your heart. Feel His nearness and be assured that you have not been left alone in your pain.
Prayer is an amazing avenue of healing because it allows you to talk to the Physician, and the One who truly understands. You can say what’s on your heart and mind without fear of being misrepresented or misunderstood. There is no fear being placed on you when you speak to God in prayer. He listens. He understands. He sends comfort. He is your tender Father who cares.
What is on your heavy heart today? Sadness? Emptiness? Loneliness? Feeling forgotten and misused? Feeling abandoned? Then walk among the fields. Touch the lilies. Catch a butterfly. Allow the raindrops to fall gently across your face, and know that you are never alone! Hope is alive and will continue to grow stronger with each passing day when you open your heart to prayer. – Clara Hinton
“Praying is talking in confidence to the One who cares.” --C. Hinton
“Pray without ceasing.” -- I Thessalonians 5:17
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